Tintin. She’s been working hard at trying to plunder my self-confidence…
Today in the undies section of Makro (we just walked past by the way…I wasn’t undie shopping in Makro) there’s a lit up billboard of a pretty young skinny model in her undies. Tintin says “mama – I wish you could be like that girl” (I can’t baby. I had choc-chip muffins for breakfast)
Then…I am looking for fabric shopping bags to put our staff christmas hampers in. I held one up to see the size and she asks “mama – are you wearing that to the wedding (a shopping bag???? To my cousin’s wedding. Really? Doesn’t say much for my dress sense does it?)
In her school report she *failed* “I help clean up the classroom”. I asked her why. She says, “I don’t clean” (making your mama look like a winning parent right there)
And…she follows me everywhere. EVERYWHERE!! In the shower she sits on the floor and gawks at me. She matter-of-fact told me “Jesse has a small bum. And Charlie has a small bum. And I have a small bum. But you? You have a big big (she pauses for effect, exaggeration, to take a breath, but definitely not to soften the blow…) BIG bum like a rhino” (uuummm…remind me why I allow you to heckle me in the shower??)
Luckily I have a rhino skin to match my rhino bum!!